Just Be

The best parts of every day.

I am one of those people that looks for signs. That prays for them. That needs to know that what I'm thinking or feeling is okay. I don't do well with uncertainty or change. For the past 2 years of my life I feel like I really haven't handled it well. Starting with our move to Alabama (a change), and then becoming pregnant (another change), and lastly becoming a mom (a big, BIG change). You see I like to be in control but i'm learning to let that go. Everything keeps changing whether we are aware of it or not.

Even right now I sense change in the air as we are about to embark on our one year Alabama anniversary. One year later we are now starting to talk and think about the transition back home. Even though this is exciting it is still yet again change. There is also the uncertainty of where in Montana we will be living and what we will be doing. But instead of clinging to the false security of fixed ideas and tribal views I have I'm going to do something different. I'm going to live an authentic life. I'm going to relax and enjoy just being human.

This means understanding everything changes. Nothing last. I'm going to let go of What ifs. I'm going to work on being fully present each and every day. Live my life in the moment. Yes we are going to be moving. Yes my baby is going to keep growing. Yes my husband and I are going to get older. These are things I cannot change. What I can do though is embrace them and love them each and every day. 

When I try to control things I become frazzled. I stop noticing the little things. I take on too many things at once. I'm always so focused on what is next that i'm completely letting what is present pass by. I think maybe that is why time is beginning to go by so quickly. These feelings just aren't good for me. So beginning today I'm going to relax, breathe, and not dwell on the future or the past. I'm going to enjoy the little things. Even the day to day tasks that seem mundane. I'm going to just be. I'm fully embracing right now, no matter what the situation in my life may be. Everyday is a new challenge and a opportunity to discover something new. How amazing is that?